I couldn't sleep last night, thoughts swirling about in my head. That feeling, when you're tired and you have planned a day of work for the next day and you keep looking at the clock. I tried breathing deeply and massaging lavender into my temples. Then later some warm milk. I tried writing in my journal, but it was a new notebook and it had it's own demons that I was too tired to battle with. My mind refused to turn off and I didn't really sleep until about an hour before my alarm went off. Needless to say, today I was a zombie.
Sometimes I enjoy a bit of sleep deprivation. It sends me into a state of almost hallucination, things seeming sort of surreal, colors a bit strange, sounds even. It can put a new spin on things, liberate the mind a bit from the mundane. A little distortion of perspective can be just what's needed to bring focus and clarity (I hope these will soon follow as my mind currently feels like a room in which a hundred people have been given musical instruments of different sorts and each is playing their own tune as though they couldn't hear the others!)
I walked around in my zombie state for most of the day, wishing there was a way to snap out of it and function normally, new perspective or not. In the afternoon the sky, broody all day, broke into a thunderstorm. We went for a walk on the beach. I like how the sandpipers all cluster together, run towards the waves, then away from them, or all take flight together in formation. The tide was in so far we had to walk back over the rocks. It felt a longer way going back, it always does. I am tired now and will sleep and dream of all the sandcastles I want to build.
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